Jesus – the BFF

Some years back, I watched with a heavy heart as my oldest daughter (12 at the time) sought after a “BFF”—best friend forever. With three international moves in three years, her friends were spread out over several continents.

When I was a tween, we had “friends.” Along the line, someone upped the ante. Today, mere “friends” aren’t good enough. We need a best friend forever.

“Mom, who is your BFF?” my daughter asked.

That was a good question. My husband would qualify as my best friend but lacks the “forever” title since we didn’t meet until I was 26. My friend Dana has known me the longest, but we haven’t lived in the same city since 2008.

Tween girls can be mean, changing their friends as quickly as they change their favorite song or fashion item. We’ve weathered that storm in our home already. In elementary school, BFFs changed daily.

Finding and keeping a BFF is a futile attempt. In our sinful nature, no one person can remain a best, steadfast, and true friend forever. And we can’t be that BFF to them either.

The only person who really qualifies for the title of BFF is Jesus.

When my youngest daughter was a toddler, she learned in Sunday School that Jesus was her forever friend—the only true friend who will last a lifetime.

BEST FRIEND…

Jesus calls us his friend. We are no longer servants. Servants don’t know what their master is doing. Jesus made known all that God told him. We are his friends because he didn’t withhold any of God’s instruction from us (John 15:15). How many friends have you had who always spoke truth with love? Schoolgirl friendships are often based on sharing secrets and keeping them. Jesus kept no secret from us. He shared the secret of God’s love for us, openly and freely.

Jesus died for us. Jesus showed his love and the depth of his friendship with us by laying down his life for us (John 15:13). Our friends of this world will put themselves before us. Jesus put us before himself.

Jesus loves us for who we are, not what we do, wear, or say. Our identity as a believer in Christ is based IN CHRIST, as HIS friend.  Our friendship with Jesus is not based on our common interests, hobbies, in how we act, how we dress, or what we say—it’s only through faith (Gal. 3:26). We don’t have to do anything to maintain our friendship with Jesus (Gal. 5:1). He did it all.

Jesus chose us. My daughter wanted a BFF. That would have required getting to know other 12-year-old girls, their interests, and personalities. Then pursuing a friendship and hoping the other girl felt likewise while also being prepared for rejection. Jesus as the true BFF means we don’t choose him. He chose us (John 15:16). Jesus pursues us and accepts us.

…FOREVER

Jesus lives forever. He is the Alpha and the Omega, the first and last, the beginning and the end (Rev 22:13). He will never die on us. Our friendship with him will last forever because He lives forever. Our friendship with him is eternal.

Jesus will never leave us nor forsake us (Heb. 13:5, Joshua 1:5). Jesus isn’t going to move away or pull away. He won’t quit on us. Jesus will never give us up for someone or something else.

Jesus is always with us. He is with us to the end of the age (Matt 28:20). Jesus is never too busy for us nor too preoccupied with other matters. He is present for every tear and every joy (Psalm 56:8). Other friends will never be able to spend every moment with us. Jesus is with us always.

So with some gentle coaching, my husband and I redirected our daughter away from her BFF search. You see, that role of BFF in her life was already taken. Jesus had chosen her several years ago, and my girl loves Jesus. Any 12-year-old girl would ultimately fail her in every way as a BFF. Other friends will love us based on what we do, wear, or say. Other friends will leave us and forsake us, be busy, and ultimately take their last breaths.

Jesus is the “One and Only” (John 1:14). Best Friend. Forever.

–Marci Turner

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